Fucking viruses. Sometimes the convenience of a computer just doesn't seem worth the hassle. It's been a while since I've messed with this thing I was so frustrated with it. Not having the computer up gave made me realize I could be doing other stuff when I'm bored. But it knew I'd want a fix sooner or later. They know you'll come back so they just wait, big black screen just waiting to swallow down hours of your time in a few gulps. Yup, and where am I at this moment? But I've got so many tools at my disposal with a computer. Movie times, maps, porn clips, movie trailers, news, pictures of naked redheads dressed in high heels and leather skirts that go all the way - nevermind. I missed the computer but sometimes I just wanna smash it for killing my time.
Marcel's birthday is coming up!! It's only a little more than a week away and Lana and I still don't have anything planned. My dad went out and got him a HUGE Incredible Hulk pinata, candy, table cloth, napkins, plates, etc. Think he's hinting at something? Yeah, we've been putting off making plans but I cringe at cleaning up after another birthday party. He's turning five. FIVE. A monumental day, besides his birthday, has snuck up on me. His first day of school. When did he get old enough for school? It seems like I was just potty training him and watching blues clues with him. Now he's asking questions that make me pause without an answer and finding a level of independence I'm not used to. He's always staying the night at my dad's or Lana's moms place. Sounds selfish (becuase it is) but I miss having a sleeping baby on my chest or burping him after he ate. There's a lot about the "baby" stage I miss. I never thought for a second I'd understand my mom telling me, "You'll always be my baby." I used to hate it. I used to get really mad at her for embarrassing me and get mean. Teenagers are such assholes.
Sometimes we grow out of it. I think I have, I think I have, I think I have...
April 29, 2017 at 01:47PM
3 hours ago